According to psychologists, self-isolation is a rather difficult test for the human psyche. Even those who are usually uncommunicative and withdrawn can become discouraged. Yulia Kuznetsova, a family specialist, tells how to overcome the feeling of loneliness and stay in a good mood. And BeautyHack.ru editor Kristina Semina tries on advice for herself and shares her experience of quarantine life.
Julia Kuznetsova
psychologist, specialist of the Family Center "Istoki"
“In such a situation, our physical and emotional state is very vulnerable. People are deprived of the ability to deal with stress in the usual ways. You can’t talk live and get the advice you need, walk or go to the gym and take out all the negative energy on the treadmill.”
In self-isolation, people begin to experience various negative emotions that are not so noticeable in ordinary life. Most often it is anxiety for health, irritation and anger, boredom and loneliness.
According to psychologists, forced isolation is a rather difficult experience even for those who consider themselves an introvert and do not feel the need for daily close communication.
Tips to help you deal with feelings of loneliness:
- Enjoy the time you spend alone with yourself. For example, right now you can visit the best museums in the world by visiting them online, besides, it is completely free.
- Call old friends and acquaintances. You will be surprised to feel how glad you are to hear them again.
- Take care of your development. Pick up a guitar tutorial, improve your knowledge of a foreign language or learn how to cook a complex but delicious cake. New knowledge and skills will broaden your horizons and attract even more friends. They will also add emotions.
- Be physically active. Now is the time to master yoga skills or learn dance moves from online lessons. After exercise, endorphins are produced, but the stress hormone cortisol is suppressed. Even if it seems that there is neither strength nor desire for the lesson, just start - with simple exercises.
- Listen to cheerful, cheerful music more often. Turn it on at full volume and dance, sing - let this music sound within you, making you happier.
- Try to be helpful to others. Volunteer, for example. Volunteers are usually sociable and friendly people, you will surely find many new friends among them.
- Do not forget about your loved ones, about those who are most vulnerable and who need your care and support. Call them more often on the phone, on Skype.
- Be sure to remind each other that the epidemic will end and we will return to our usual way of life. Now, stay at home. It is important.
The editor's experience: does advice really help
Christina Semina
editor of BeautyHack.ru
- On self-isolation all alone for five weeks. On Sunday, March 15, we celebrated my mother's birthday, then I came to my house and, as in Brodsky's poem, never left the room. My trips to the grocery store in the next doorway (maximum once a week) can probably be ignored.
I will note right away that even before the forced isolation, my mood was not very good: a trip to Spain broke down and because of this I lost almost half of the money for a ticket and an apartment. Plus, terrible news on TV, fear for their loved ones, etc. But despite this, she held on and encouraged her relatives and friends who were anxious. In addition, I continued to work remotely, and in the evening I arranged home workouts for myself.
I had more free time to watch TV series and films, read books, for the first time in many years I started experimenting again in the kitchen - making pizza, muffins. I also continued to stay in touch with my relatives and friends, and real meetings were replaced by face time. In general, every day I intuitively performed each item from the list that the psychologist suggests. And I thought it worked.
But in the third week, something went wrong. I could not cope with my mood, I physically did not want to take out the rug, to play sports online. I got tired of TV shows, my eyes got tired of books. Conversations with loved ones, which involuntarily spilled over into the topic of the virus, ceased to please me. I tried to be positive only with my mom and grandparents. The rest had no strength. I was overwhelmed by a feeling of loneliness, I was sure that now those who live with family / husband / children are much better. Elementary: people nearby could see the state of another, hug, help with a word. And when my friends said how hard it was with their husbands and children, I felt irritated. Sometimes, jokingly, I tried to convey the idea that being alone is bad, but in response I received - “how I would like, like you, to live alone now”.The psychological state worsened - at first I wanted to get a cat or a dog (but by that time all the shelters were closed), and then I began to think that I wanted to see a psychologist for the first time.
I was saved by two casual conversations with acquaintances who also found themselves at home. And then I realized that for the first time with someone on the same wavelength.
I really felt better. And at this moment, the realization came that a person who does not have this or that experience simply cannot imagine it in his life and will never be able to understand the feelings of another. Not because he's bad, maybe it's just human nature.
In the fourth week, I was already getting out of my negative state, very gradually. This weekend, I did a digital detox - I turned off my phone, didn't go to social networks, didn't read or watch the news. I advise everyone!
Today, in the fifth week, I have full acceptance of the situation and I feel very good. And, after a while, already from my own experience, I can add a few more tips to the psychologist's recommendations above:
- If you feel bad, talk about it. There will definitely be a person who will support, and not pull the blanket over himself.
- Keep a diary. I do not do this every day, but I confidently say that this method works: negative emotions go away when you transfer them to paper.
- Do not dive into negativity, look for only pluses in the situation. For example, I appreciate that I can wake up and go to bed as much as I want, do only what I want (people in the family do not succeed).
- Explore yourself. There are many articles about how spouses supposedly get to know each other on self-isolation, but it seems to me that lonely people now have the opportunity to get to know themselves: at this moment all hidden thoughts and feelings come to the surface, it's time to work them out so that after quarantine to become an even more conscious and mentally strong person.
