We love to sum up the year until December 31 (read about this by the link), and then, right from January 1, barely eating salads, start changing life with renewed vigor. Bad news: this is not only ineffective, but also harmful. Why - explains our expert. We advise you to read her tips, relax and finally get pleasure from the process, not from victory!
Psychologist of the Moscow Psychological Aid Service
Once I witnessed a conversation between two young women: the first described in paints what would change in her life from next year - they say, she will change work, and return sports, and master landscape design, and put things in order in her personal life, and she will lose weight straight From January. To which the second, after a little thought, issued: "The plan is, of course, smart, but failed."
Perhaps, many dream of starting a new life from the new year. On the one hand, it is hardly reasonable to deny yourself this pleasure. However, it is not pleasant to feel later disappointment, annoyance and apathy from the collapse of illusions. Maybe it's time to admit that the idea of a "New Year coup" has little chance? And let's see why.
Traditionally, the New Year is a time of fun, meetings with friends, gatherings at the table and staying up late, all sorts of excesses and … to put it bluntly - you want to sleep soundly! Especially when outside the window there is not "frost and sun", but slush and drizzling rain. The beginning of an active cultural or physical culture life spoils the mood, because … they are canceled. In the end, we still continue to celebrate, but with a sense of guilt. Better to allow yourself to truly relax, enjoying every moment and feeling great at the same time!
The desire to change everything at once
The idea of starting from scratch is attractive - as is the idea of how much more correct and beautiful everything will be with the advent of change. So we write down in advance in the new diary the tasks that must be completed - from putting in order the papers and ending with getting rid of the extra twenty kilograms. It doesn’t matter how much both that and another have accumulated - for some reason I believe that everything will work out right away! But the more global the planned changes, the more difficult it is to implement them. It is wiser to start with small steps: let the progress be small, but it will be. For example, it is better to limit yourself to treats than to completely ban them, and then break off. And immediately put the two newly paid invoices in a separate file, signing the date - at least something …
Lack of proper motivation
In order for the changes to take place, they must be absolutely necessary - that is, not dependent on certain conditions, a convenient moment or a suitable situation. Ask yourself the question: how important is the goal, is it a need? Most likely, if it is, then you are already working to achieve it. If we are talking about what it would be good to have - say, a house, a prestigious job or cubes on the press - and in principle the situation suits it, then it is difficult for plans to start being implemented both from January 1 and from summer. It is unnecessary to tie life metamorphoses to the beginning of the year - better understand what you really need and show perseverance.
Increased interest in other people's success
By the end of December, social networks are full of summing up - mostly, of course, impressive. It's time to imagine the past year, see your "mistakes" and want to fix them in the future. Of course, sometimes the example of others helps change.
However, it often leads to attempts to achieve what you really don't want, but "like everyone else."
Love what you have and strive for what you love. Has anyone visited 10 countries in a year or got promoted? And you have beautiful roses blooming and a new greenhouse will soon be built … A friend got married, and a classmate moved abroad? And you finally paid off the loan and you can stop working overtime. Do not succumb to the general excitement, feel yours.
Loud promises to yourself and others
Remember this expression: "All the steam went off the beep"? Perhaps some are motivated to execute the plan by the need to voice it. But more often, having informed everyone about the decision to learn to play the piano virtuoso or to become a real "shark of the pen", a person calms down and … relaxes. One gets the feeling that a start has been made, the first step has been taken, and this is the main thing. Their objective capabilities and willingness to work remain, as it were, overboard. It seems that the New Year will bring new strength, but be realistic - especially in the promises you make to other people.
In general, it is very harmful to postpone what can be done now. Changes are needed - start now! Innovations are constantly being introduced into life, and not from some significant date. Therefore, how successful the coming and following years will be depends on the daily steps of a person. With a new step to your happiness!