Three-year-olds Code: "I Don't Eat, I Don't Sleep, I Grumble

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Video: Three-year-olds Code: "I Don't Eat, I Don't Sleep, I Grumble

Отличия серверных жестких дисков от десктопных
Video: What if You Stop Eating? 2023, January
Three-year-olds Code: "I Don't Eat, I Don't Sleep, I Grumble
Three-year-olds Code: "I Don't Eat, I Don't Sleep, I Grumble
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BeautyHack columnist Olga Belousova has been talking about the crisis for three years.

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“Where has my obedient child gone?” - you think, looking at how your child fights in hysterics near another showcase with chocolates. Congratulations, as this marks the beginning of a “great and terrible” crisis of three years. You googled about it, you were in it yourself. The parent is only grounded in theory and practice until the moment when he feels that he is losing control over what is happening. Such an opening generates a lot of feelings, which, as a rule, trigger the easiest way to take control of the situation: start screaming too. Spectacular, of course, but very expensive. So let's figure out what happens to a child at the age of three and how to help him cope.

In the first three years of life, the baby receives important discoveries about love, safety and trust in the world solely with the help of a parent. But, starting at two and a half years, everything changes.

At the forefront is now the relatively independent formation of the personality on the part of confidence, will and a healthy level of aggressiveness. And these berries are sour, so the parent carefully removes them from the child's "diet". So the main manifestations of the crisis are "myself!" are protest, devaluation, despotism. The child uses these extreme measures to form important personality traits, and the parent's task is to soften them and direct them in the right direction.

Using the example of three classic situations, we will find out what quality is developing at the moment and how the parent can be useful.

Situation one: “I don’t eat”

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The manifestations of protest behavior are obvious here. And the first thing you see when a child refuses to eat is insubordination, self-will. It is completely incomprehensible whether the baby is really not hungry right now, or is it just an attempt to be stubborn. Be that as it may, the plan of action is as follows:

- “I see that now you don’t want to eat” - in this way you give the child feedback and therefore there is no need to intensify the manifestations of protest;

“I'll leave food on the table. She will wait until you get hungry”- you show the child that you reckon with his opinion and give him the right to choose. As a rule, in this case, the little stubborn person very soon returns to eating with the whole family.

Situation two: "I am not sleeping."

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The question of falling asleep is quite voluminous and ambiguous.

First, the inability to fall asleep may be a consequence of the child's anxiety, and here it is important to find out what caused it. Therefore, provide your baby with at least ten hugs a day and exclude from his life any situations with a strong emotional response (both positive and negative) for a while. If this does not help, contact a specialist.

Second, your child may simply not be ready for bed. For example, a new interesting cartoon, an active game or a hearty dinner over-activate the functioning of the child's digestive and nervous systems. So make sure that a couple of hours before bedtime the baby is only busy with the usual business, and if he gets hungry, offer something light.

Third, sometimes refusing to go to bed is a manifestation of negativity.

The little "mister no" examines what happens if he does the opposite. The adult's task is to show that the family system, no matter what, remains stable.

Therefore, in the moment of resistance, it is important for you to calmly continue to prepare for sleep. And if the kid is adamant, the phrase “Don't go to sleep” works great. And "mister no" will definitely go.

Situation three: “grumbling”

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Grunt is of two kinds: "I myself!" and I will not!".

To the kid, persistently repeating "I myself!" it is really important to do something yourself. A child who is allowed to grow up as an enthusiast and a little explorer; he has adequate self-esteem and an optimistic attitude towards new beginnings. Of course, the parent must ensure that self-study is safe for the child's health and life.

But "I will not!" declare those children who learn to leave the old and learn the new. Therefore, they choose a strategy of depreciation. For example, it seems that yesterday the kid liked chicken broth, and today he refuses to eat it. And this happens to many of his preferences. It's okay, your patient permission to define new flavors will be the best guide through this part of the crisis.

It turns out that any development is born of conflict, therefore difficult moments in the relationship with your child only indicate what is worth paying attention to. So if you suddenly have a longing for the times when the baby was exceptionally obedient, remember that a few sour berries will not hurt this jam at all.

Text: Olga Belousova

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