Why don't we trust people, what causes the fear of disease, and what simple exercise can help us cope with anxiety attacks? BeautyHack readers asked the most pressing questions to psychologist Natalia Bychkova.
Certified psychologist, specialist in the field of family psychology, coach of anti-stress programs and personal growth programs
"How to stop worrying about everything and enjoy life?"
The first thing to do is stop identifying with worry. It is not you who are worried, but your mind. Because the nature of the mind either regrets the past or worries about the future. If your worries are related to a future that has not yet arrived, fear may be at the root. Maybe you are afraid to move into this future.
You are asking how you can stop worrying - you just need to return your mind to the present moment. But how to do it? Only by being constantly aware of what is happening right now. If fear builds up, take a free breath, hold your breath for 5-10 seconds and exhale. You can also do yoga and start meditating (you can find out why it is useful here) for 15-20 minutes a day. And when you will return one hundred percent to the "here and now", then you will begin to enjoy life.
"How to get rid of the fear of poverty?"
You can get rid of it only by experiencing. What is behind this fear, what feelings? Feelings of shame, resentment, humiliation, hopelessness? Do not be afraid to dive into them and do not run away from it, do not look for a reason.
Begin giving alms to the poor and at the same time observe how you feel. Neglect, arrogance, condescension, or compassion? Just watch the sensations. Do this repeatedly, and you will receive an answer or insight to your question. But a question from me - are these people somehow different from us?
"How not to be afraid of disease and death?"
This is a very deep and good question, which is very subtly connected with your stay on earth. Perhaps intuitively you felt it. The fear will go away when you feel and realize your need, "need" for people and the planet, no matter how pathetic it sounds.
As we take more responsibility for ourselves and others, fear dissolves. And then a sense of belonging, love, commitment blooms. Fear will disappear when you do something useful for people. I know this from my personal experience.
"How to get rid of distrust of people?"
The basis of a healthy personality lies on three pillars: faith in oneself, faith in people and faith in the Divine. When we see bad intentions in other people, we ourselves suffer more from it. We strengthen our faith in distrust and therefore do not grow as a person.
Our nature is to trust, life is impossible without trust. One way or another, we trust our money to the bank, life to the driver who drives the bus, we trust the doctor who treats us. Therefore, it cannot be said that you do not trust people at all. There was just some negative experience that you got hooked on, and the mind constantly revolves around this experience from the past. And you do not want to let him go and you are considering a new relationship through the prism of this experience. How not to get stuck on such things, I teach in my trainings.
"Tell us how to deal with panic attacks?"
You don't need to deal with them, you can only be aware of them. All you need to know about this is that panic attacks are not experienced emotions of fear, anxiety, frustration, which have gone into the unconscious and subconscious, and in certain situations they come to the surface, and we are afraid to meet with them. But there is no other choice but to consciously experience it.
And what will help us with this? Our breath and, of course, meditation. From me a life hack: when panic comes, start observing your breathing: while inhaling, hold your breath for 5-10 seconds and then exhale, do this 5-10 times with an interval of 5-10 minutes. Learn ujjai breathing and come to my live streams on Instagram.